Tuesday, August 18, 2009

If My Daughter Can Blog, So Can I...


Since my 27 year old, newly married daughter started a blog, I decided I would copycat her and start one, too (but with a different-looking page layout, because the one she chose is surrounded by polka dots...which I adore...but I think I'm way too old to be loving them as much as I do). 
At first, I imagined that blogging might help me stop crying each time I remember that she moved far, far away - to a galaxy called Seattle - a godforsaken place that takes two incredibly expensive plane rides to get to from here (Hartford, CT). 
Then I told myself - hey, maybe blogging will light up my life (move over Debbie Boone) and make me famous, like I used to want to be when I was younger.
What I am finding out, though, as I type and edit and re-edit, is that I am spending so much blogging time revising and correcting that I'm incapable of writing any content, because I keep obsessively checking and rechecking for possible spelling and grammar errors. I hope I'll be able to cut loose, soon, and write something worth reading, like how I had a coupon at the New Balance store for a free foot exam and two pairs of socks, so I went there to try my luck at having my feet evaluated on what I immediately realized was a bogus foot machine. I let my needing-to-be-convinced grieving self believe that I should buy the very shoes the sales boy brought out for me. I'm not being ageist, but he was a boy, in comparison to 61 year-old-lady me. He assured me that this pair of shoes was the only pair that would make my high-arched, sore big toes feet feel like walking. He neglected to mention that they were also the most expensive shoes there, but I ignored that red flag and instead agreed with him that he was right - the shoes must be bought. 
I am now wearing them so I can see if they hurt (even though sitting instead of walking around doesn't count as trying them out, does it?).  So far, so good.
I just realized I bought them because my experience in the New Balance store momentarily sucked me back in time to my grief-free childhood, when I used to get my August back-to-school shoes (as well as those cancerous feet X-rays in the foot-measuring machine). The nice shoe salesman used to tie my laces real tight, like the New Balance salesboy did today. Even though I've been wallowing in daughter-grief all day, my memory floodgates opened up long enough to blind me for a nano-second. Buying shoes allowed me to close the gates and feel like I used to when I was young and daughterless.
Haggling for my two pairs of free socks (offered on my coupon) brought me back to reality, but what a relief it was to let grief take a back seat for a few minutes so both my inner Imelda Marcos and long, lost childhood could come out and play.
See, I told my recently-sad self, it's not necessary to let grief take everything away from you.

5 comments:

Unknown said...

i like your writing.
as far as shoes go - from my experience (as well as my mom's whose feet are hard to please) - mephisto shoes are the best. Ecco is also nice. both are expensive but if your feet bother you - getting rid of pain is worth every penny.

Joan said...

So sorry about Amy's exile to Seattle. And I was feeling blue about my John moving back to Durham, 20 minutes away! This is your cousin speaking.

femidonna said...

I think you meant Debbie Boone not Karen Carpenter. On another note, just back from Seattle, Victoria and Vancouver-great food, esp. Wild Ginger restaurant in Seattle...

Sharron Freeman said...

See - I KNEW I'd make a mistake! Darn it all.

You're right - Pat's daughter (who had to grow up listening to dear old Dad sing Loveletters in the Sand) sang that song, not starving Karen C.

Yes, yes, yes. I know Seattle offers good food, but so do I...Go figure.

Anonymous said...

love it! blogging definitely suits you. sorry to hear about your grief. instead of buying shoes, though, how 'bout a transcontinental journey? come visit, we miss you! xo steph